Private Communication to Nurse Chapel, Non-Native

[science_blues]

I am aware that my departure was abrupt following our most recent social interaction. It has come to my attention that this abruptness could be easily misconstrued, particularly considering the concurrent sociocultural faux-pas I committed.

I desire to have a conversation on the subject.

If necessary, I will preface the aforementioned conversation with an apology regarding the aforementioned sociocultural faux-pas.

Please inform me when/if you are available for such a conversation.

Spock.

Comments

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine was, thankfully, alone in her quarters when she received Spock's message. She'd been doing her best to avoid thinking about that afternoon in the galley, and had succeeded fairly well, for the most part. But reading Spock's words brought all her confused feelings rushing back.

She read over the message a few times, trying to decipher it. That Spock wanted to speak with her was...promising, she supposed. But she seemed to want to apologize for the whole incident. If necessary. What did that mean?

Christine wasn't exactly looking forward to the conversation. There was really no way to tell what Spock's feelings - no, not feelings of course - were on what had happened. And she wasn't quite sure of her own, anymore. But, she thought resignedly, there was no sense in putting it off. She may as well just get it over with.

Spock,

Thank you for your message. I'm sure there's no need to apologize. I am available to meet with you now, if you're free.

Christine

Private Communication to Nurse Chapel, Non-Native

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Your proposal is acceptable. What is your preferred location?

Spock.

Private Communication to Spock

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Spock,

I'm in my quarters, if you'd like to come here.

Christine

Private Communication to Nurse Chapel, Non-Native

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

That is acceptable. I am en route.

Spock.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock arrived outside of Christine's quarters within minutes. She had not tarried, though she had not rushed. She did not relish the inevitable complexity of the ensuing conversation, but Spock had been most enlightening. To disregard the validity of his discussion would be illogical.

Spock pressed the panel beside the door to request entry.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine closed her eyes briefly and drew a deep breath, steadying herself. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. At least she could reasonably hope that whatever Spock had to say, she wouldn't be shy about saying it. If nothing else, this would be over soon.

She opened the door herself, and managed a small smile as she stood aside to let Spock enter.

"Spock," she said. "Please come in."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock inclined her head as Christine stood aside. She entered the room casually and paused, five feet through the threshold. She folded her hands behind her back and turned to regard Christine.

"It is common in Human culture to converse about a sexual encounter immediately following completion," Spock prefaced placidly. "I was unable to do so at the appropriate time. I was informed that this could be misconstrued as rejection.

"I wish to clarify this as I do not intend to discontinue social familiarity with you," Spock concluded.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine could feel herself blushing in the face of Spock's matter-of-fact reference to what had happened. She glanced away, staring intently at the carpet.

"I wasn't sure what to think," she murmured. "I thought maybe I'd done something wrong."

She looked slowly up again as the Vulcan's words sunk in, her brow furrowed as she met Spock's eyes. "What do you mean, unable to do so?"

Surely, whatever plans Spock had had, they couldn't have been urgent enough to explain the way she'd rushed out of the kitchen so quickly.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

"You did not preform inadequately," Spock assured her.

"At the time," Spock answered slowly, "I was excessively intoxicated. Though not rendered physically unable, in the literal terminology, had I attempted to speak I would have likely expelled the contents of my digestive tract."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Spock's less than reassuring comment on Christine's abilities was lost in the wake of what she said next.

"Intoxicated?" she repeated faintly, her eyes widening as she felt the bottom of her stomach drop. "Oh, God."

She dropped heavily into a chair, her mind racing in an attempt to deny it. Spock had seemed perfectly fine when she'd entered the galley. And she knew there had been no chocolate in those cookies. There was no way what Spock said could be true.

But it had to be true; Vulcans didn't lie, and at any rate there was no reason for Spock to do so. Christine swallowed against the bile rising up in her throat. What she'd done...it was no better than what Marlena had done to Bill. And Spock wouldn't have chosen you any sooner than Bill would have chosen Marlena, a treacherous voice piped up inside her head, but Christine squashed the thought immediately. That wasn't important now.

"Spock," she said at last, fighting to keep her voice steady. "Please. I'm...I'm sorry. I didn't know. If I'd had any idea...I would never have..." She swallowed again, and shook her head. "Please, you have to believe me. I'm so sorry."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock had anticipated a myriad of emotional responses. This was not among them. She blinked and arched a brow at Christine.

"I am aware that you did not intend to intoxicate me," Spock responded evenly. "There is no need for apology. My own lack of attention is at fault.

"You do not need to be dismayed," Spock hazarded.

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine shook her head silently, still not quite able to accept Spock's assurances. If Spock had been as inebriated as she claimed, Christine should have noticed that something was off. She should have made sure. "I'm sorry," she repeated, unable to stop herself.

And now Spock was saying that Christine had intoxicated her, albeit inadvertently.

"But I...I don't understand," she added at last. "What happened? You didn't even touch any chocolate."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock's brows rose and she was silent briefly. It was curious, the scattered information humans had on Vulcanoid peoples.

"True, there was no chocolate," Spock conceded. "The intoxicant to which I am referring is cinnamomum verum, cinnamon.

"I rarely encounter cinnamomum verum, I did not identify it before I received a severe interactive dose," Spock admitted. "You are not at fault, you were unaware."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Cinnamon... Christine's mouth went dry. The cookies had been full of cinnamon. Covered in cinnamon. Had Spock really been unaware of what they were making?

She'd never actually seen the effect that chocolate had on Vulcans, but she'd certainly heard plenty about it. How could she have been unaware that there was something else to watch out for?

"But I should have been aware," she said dully. "I should have checked first, and made sure that I wasn't going to get you drunk."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

"It is illogical to ruminate upon what cannot be altered," Spock pointed out. "I harbor no ill will concerning my intoxication, you should not be overly concerned."

Drunk was not an accurate description of the state she had been reduced to, but the word served, nevertheless.

"For future reference," Spock continued, "Cinnamomum verum has the probability of generating a much more...precarious state than chocolate based intoxication. It would be wise to avoid risking this."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine took a deep breath and looked at Spock properly. She still felt horrible about taking advantage of Spock, but if Spock truly had no regrets...perhaps everything would be all right.

"What do you mean?" she asked, mostly to fill the silence, because she couldn't bring herself to care about the specifics. Clearly the cinnamon was quite potent, probably more so than chocolate. However, Christine had no intention of getting either substance near to a Vulcan ever again, if she could help it.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

"Cinnamomum verum, in Vulcanoids, disrupts the chemical balance of the lower brain," Spock explained. "It disrupts cognitive faculty, balance, perception, and causes a rise in inherent body temperature.

"It can cause a severe loss of control," Spock continued slowly, "Without the...preferred outlet, it is not unrealistic to assume violence could occur."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine listened intently, her unease returning immediately and increasing with every word Spock said. Something about the symptoms the Vulcan was describing - loss of control, of normal cognitive function, increased body temperature - made her stomach clench unpleasantly.

"What preferred outlet, Spock?" she asked, her voice very quiet.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Christine's demeanor had shifted, Spock noted it silently.

"The predominant effect of cinnamomum verum intoxication is an abrupt and pervasive...I apologize, the nearest Standard terminology of which I am aware is arousal." Spock paused. "The preferred outlet is sexual intercourse."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine nodded and looked away, not trusting herself to speak.

An aphrodisiac. She'd been right, then. Spock would never have looked twice at her, if Christine hadn't drugged her. She should have known better than to think things could have been that easy. That this Spock actually found her attractive, when the other one...

After a long moment, she looked back at Spock. "I'm very sorry, Spock," she said stiffly. "I didn't mean to put you in that position. I know you know that, but...I should have realized something was wrong. I'm sorry."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

"To what position do you refer?" Spock queried automatically. "I have already informed you that I harbor no ill will concerning my intoxication, there is no reason to continue apologizing.

"As we have clarified why I departed abruptly," Spock continued evenly, "Is is possible to hold a belated discussion concerning our sexual encounter? I do not desire it to be a disruptive social element."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine stared at Spock, uncomprehending. She couldn't believe that Spock was being deliberately cruel, though why else she would force Christine to say it out loud, Christine couldn't understand. But...well, a clear apology was the least Spock deserved.

"I mean your...arousal." She could feel her cheeks growing hot again. "Making you feel things you wouldn't normally have felt, and do things you didn't have a choice about."

She paused only briefly before continuing.

"And you don't have to worry, Spock. I don't want it to disrupt anything either." She took a breath. "If you want to just forget it...I promise, I won't mention it again."

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock's brows rose in tandem as she absorbed Christine's comment. Somehow, despite the gradual clarification of the situation, Christine had still managed to misconstrue Spock's intentions. This was most curious.

"Human speech patterns have a tendency to be increasingly nonspecific when discomfort is introduced, if I am misinterpreting your meaning, please provide clarification," Spock prefaced. "While it is true that I would not have normally experienced the abrupt and severe chemical imbalance that sparked the events of our sexual encounter, it is not equal to state that I would not have pursued the goal.

"Admittedly, I would have preferred a more gradual approach, but as there was no conflict of consent, that would have been unnecessary," Spock added, almost conversationally. "However, if the concept of future intimacy is distasteful to you, I shall agree to forget it."

[headnursechapel.livejournal.com]

Christine stared at Spock, not quite daring to believe what she was hearing.

"Future intimacy?" she repeated. "You mean...it wasn't just the cinnamon? You'd want to...to sleep together again?"

She held her breath as she waited for Spock's reply.

[science-blues.livejournal.com]

Spock considered her query briefly and formulated a response. However, given the current trend of miscommunication, she opted for the shortest accurate reply.

"Yes."